1:55 AM

Things at home are not looking good. Things at school are worse. I am struggling to study and wrap my head around things but I just can't seem to even get started. I am awful, really. And financially, things look pretty rough. Honestly, I am really... I dunno when I last smiled a genuine smile. Probably when it's just me and my sister playing around in our empty house. No parents, all our problem forgotten. Just watching shows and laughing and teasing the characters. Or just tumbling around trying to do gymnastics, and failing miserably. Also, I only had a sincere laugh when I watch my variety shows.

But they are fleeting.

And they pass by ever so quickly. Even when I'm out with my friends, I can't completely forget my problems and they linger. Ruining my mood and dampening the spirits of the people around me. Conflict everywhere. And it seems like nothing is going right...

I am so afraid I'll be kicked out of school. But at the same time the sigh of school and the modules I'm taking makes me wanna puke blood. Or jump off a cliff. And at home, I dun get any peace either.

I want to escape.

Unfortunately, I can't. So, I just waste away the minutes and doodle more K-On characters. Wishing that I was a fictional character somehow.

This is Ritsu! One of my fave characters in that anime. She's way too cool. AND I think it's extra cool that we have similar hairstyles. Lol.

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